Parents booklet - Talking with your kids about drugs
The reasons teenagers give for trying drugs and what you can say
PDF printable version of The reasons teenagers give for trying drugs and what you can say (PDF 44 KB)Here are some of the reasons young people give for using drugs and some ideas about how you might choose to respond to them.
“Someone had some and I just thought I’d try it.”
Express your concern and question their decision. Ask whether it was what they expected and talk about the risks of further use. Try and find out if they felt pressured – this may lead to better ways for them to handle a similar situation in the future. Consider using examples of times when you have had to deal with a similar situation.“I always wanted to try that stuff.”
Ask what made that particular drug appealing, and what they expected to get from it. Questions such as “What did you think it would be like?” and “Why that drug?” may be worthwhile. You may be able to discuss whether they have tried other drugs and if so, why. Say that you’re concerned with their behaviour and try to establish some ground rules.“All my friends were doing it so I thought ... why not?”
Make your feelings about drug use clear and explain why you don’t want them to use drugs. Ask if they felt it was safe because their friends were using it. Ask why they thought their friends used it and whether they were aware of the risks. Discuss the dangers of experimenting with drugs. It may be useful to discuss the importance of being able to make their own responsible decisions instead of following the crowd.“It made me feel really good.”
Try exploring the main reason the young person took the drug. Find out how they have been feeling. This is a good time to offer help and to find out if there is anything you can do for them or if they want to talk about another issue. Talk about less risky ways of feeling good.“All my problems from school, home and life just went away.”
This statement is a chance to really confront other issues. You can express your concern about your teenager using drugs as a means of coping. Let them know that if there are problems, you would like to talk about them. Ask what can be done to make things better. Discuss whether the problems returned after the effects of the drug wore off. Express your feelings about the dangers of using drugs to deal with problems. Make it clear that you want to work together to find a better way of solving their problems.“It gave me more confidence.”
Let them know that this is of concern to you and explain that they don’t need drugs to feel good about themselves. Share your own experiences where you also found it difficult in social situations and explain ways that helped you gain more confidence. These can be both positive and negative experiences. By acknowledging your own behaviour, you will increase your credibility with the young person. Consider ways in which you can help to improve the young person’s confidence and self-esteem.“Well, you used drugs.”
You should be prepared for this type of response if this statement applies to you. You need to be frank and open with your child. Acknowledge that illicit drugs are dangerous and that you would think differently now. You are an important role model.Help with PDF and large files
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